The Truth
by OrangeSea
Summary: Movie based. Lydia gets to choose BJ's punishment and she manages to hit him where it hurts.
1. Chapter 1

Well folks, I'm very new at this whole fanfic thing. Got into it after reading some pretty amazing stuff here, so I figured I'd give it a shot. Betelgeuse and company do not belong to me.

This is set in the movie universe. I'm not so great at these introduction thingies, so tell me what you think!

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It had been a year and a half since 'the incident'. Barbara and Adam had refused to refer to it as what it really was. Their almost exorcism, the almost exposure of all the afterlife, Lydia's almost wedding. It had been almost a lot of things, but all it boiled down to in the end was 'the incident'.

Lydia's father slipped into a comfortable sort of denial over the whole ordeal and contented himself to treating Adam and Barbara as the tenants that lived upstairs. Sweet couple, didn't get out much, he would tell people. They didn't pay him, but really they didn't get in the way and their company was more a pleasure than a burden and it made Lydia so happy to have them around. Lydia's stepmother fell back into her own little world and barely noticed Lydia at all, let alone the deceased couple.

Lydia didn't quite know what to think of 'the incident', but after a year and a half she became so engrossed with school and her photography that she just ended up not thinking about it much at all. That was part of the reason why she was so surprised when Adam and Barbara came to her with a request from, of all people, Juno.

She sat in the attic, on the overstuffed sofa that Barbara had lovingly reupholstered, and watched Juno with curious owl eyes. Juno smiled faintly and got straight to the point.

"Thank you for seeing me. We finally have the paperwork mostly completed for that… fellow. Well, you know who I'm talking about. Anyway, it was decided that further measures were to be taken to bind him. There isn't a whole lot we can do at this point but add one more stipulation. One rule he cannot break. Like his inability to say his own name."

Lydia nodded, curious to know what any of this had to do with her. Her mind filled with a million wonderful things that could be done. Maybe force him to remain in one shape, or take away his ability to snap objects into existence, or take away his flying, maybe force him to stay clean or something. The list when on and on; after all, there was so much that he _could_ do. Picking one thing alone out of the pile seemed a bit of a slap on the wrist, but hopefully whoever got to choose would think up something he would really miss.

"We want you to pick the stipulation, Lydia." She took a long drag on her cigarette and smoke leaked from the gash on her neck to hover around her head.

Lydia frowned, always a bit on the quiet side, she hesitated before asking. "Why me?"

"Well," Juno began to pace, hoping to get this over with quickly, she really had a million other things to be doing, "His last con put you in the most danger, its all in the handbook you know. I really wish someone would actually read that thing all the way through."

Lydia nodded, her mind spinning, trying to think of the one thing that would hinder the infamous Betelgeuse the absolute most. Juno stopped pacing when she noticed the look that appeared on the young woman's face.

"Well?"

"Take away his ability to lie."

Juno hadn't smiled in a long time, but she wondered vaguely if the expression that crossed her features didn't somewhat resemble the infamous grin of the ghost with the most himself.

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Half a year in the waiting room. An entire six months. Followed by why? An ENTIRE year of paperwork, and even then it wasn't all done. He didn't know what new trick they were going to pull out of their asses, but whatever it was he knew he'd be able to get around it. He had always managed before. All he had to do was wait a little bit longer.

He jumped to his feet and grinned at the sight of his old boss as she stormed briskly into her office. "JUNO, hey! Good ta see ya, what's the news? Got everything sorted out, huh? Time to head home. Check up on the plants, that sort of thing?"

Juno brushed past him and sat back down at her desk. It had a sort of order to it, but resembled a bit of a battle. Clear space was losing ground quickly. She leaned over the clutter when she spoke, feeling a spark of giddiness she didn't know she was capable of having.

"The girl came up with your punishment. Oh, you're going to love this. She took away you're ability to lie."

The poltergeist's face fell immediately. "What?"

Juno gave him a tight lipped smile of triumph, "It's all right here. Signed and official." She forked over the paperwork. Well, _his_ copy of it, anyway. She had gone on a bit of a printing spree. The interns had looked a little traumatized at her sudden burst of cheerful energy. She just responded by giving them a copy and telling them to keep it somewhere safe. Most of them had done so, immediately, for utter fear of what would happen to them if they didn't. She was considering framing a copy and hanging it behind her desk.

Betelgeuse examined the page, mouthing the words as his brow crinkled in horror. His eyes snapped from the paper to here gloating face, eyes flashing with indignant frustration. "You're kiddin'. You can't do this to me!" There was a painful pause of realization before his mouth began to run without him behind the wheel "Well, technically yes, you can, it's all been done by the book."

Interns skittered into hiding at the sudden sound that erupted from Juno's office. The cackling didn't reside for quite some time, and some of the weaker willed were allowed to go home early to recoup.

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Juno is so damned fun to write. .


	2. Chapter 2

Here's the second chapter. I'm having issues figuring out where this should go… I've got ideas of things I want to happen, but I dunno. If anyone has any suggestions I'd love to hear it!

Again, Betelgeuse and company are not mine.

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Adam chuckled to himself a little as he added the final touch to the Finton's new porch on his expansive town model. Lydia had taken to bringing home photos of whatever new town addition she could find every day. She enjoyed the exercise getting around town and it provided her plenty of opportunities to practice her photography and use the dark room her father had set up in the basement.

Barbara snuck up behind him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, pressing her cheek into his. "What is so funny?"

Adam shook his head a little, "Just remembering our little Lydia's punishment for.. for him." He couldn't help but grin and Barbara shook her head with a smile.

"Well, let's just hope it is enough. He was very clever, I mean, if anyone were to find a way around it, it would be him."

Adam shrugged and kissed his wife on the cheek, "You worry too much."

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Betelgeuse turned away from the horrible couple in disgust. He'd taken residence in the miniature town's cemetery once again, but was determined to keep a low profile until he could get to the girl alone and give her a piece of his mind. He flopped down and sprawled against the ragged looking tree near the gravestone he had claimed. Juno had left him with the hateful copy of his new rule. She hadn't told him the loopholes of course, but there were always loopholes, it was just a matter of figuring them out, picking it apart and finding the one way to undo what should have never been done in the first place.

"Stupid woman always had it out for me, from the very beginning." He nearly choked as he tried to keep himself from continuing, "Well, not really. She was pretty helpful at first when I became her assistant."

Clamping his mouth shut he wrinkled his nose and was forced to content himself with _quiet_ seething hatred, because that was the only way he could get away with it anymore.

He squinted at the miserable little piece of paper until his eyes hurt. Finally he noticed it; a miniscule smudge in the lower right hand corner. He popped a magnifying glass into his hand and peered through it. The smudge remained indistinct and tiny. He upgraded to a magnifying glass that was nearly the size of his head and chuckled. There it was. That was the answer. He read it aloud to himself.

"The party chosen to select the stipulation retains the ability to retract said stipulation or change it at any time to his or her own discretion." And he reveled in the silence that followed because it was the truth.

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Lydia squinted at the photos as they developed. She had taken this batch in her room, which she had recently redecorated with Barbara and Adam's aid. They had complained that it was too dark and dreary and had managed to convince her to accent the black with red. She didn't mind the added color. A frown wrinkled her brow as she looked a little closer to the photograph, taking it out of the chemicals and hanging it to dry. Sure enough, there was an odd smear of an orb floating in space that had not been there when the picture was taken.

She began to check the other photos and found more of the mysterious orbs. She knew that Barbara and Adam had not been in her room at the time and they were usually the cause of this sort of thing, so she decided to skim through the handbook for the recently deceased to see what it had to say on the matter.

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Betelgeuse watched lazily as the girl spoke to Barbara and Adam. She was asking them about the pictures. He knew that had been a good idea. Get her interest perked a little before confronting her outright. Now all he had to do was wait for the damned couple to leave so he could chat with the girl. Shit, what was her name again? He checked the paperwork and grunted; right, Lydia. Good thing she had to sign it.

Conveniently enough, Barbara and Adam decided to go chat with Juno to see if any new ghosts had decided to drop in. Finally. He took his chance and shouted up to Lydia as she watched her friends step through the glowing green door.

"HEY! Yeah! Down here!"

She looked down in surprise at the voice that was all too familiar, even when pitched a few octaves too high. Leaning closer she squinted into the little graveyard and frowned. "What are you doing here? Were you the one in my room when I took those pictures?"

He shrugged, at least he didn't have to lie about this. "Yeah, that was me." He kept talking, figuring it couldn't hurt to just elaborate things a little, make her feel special or some rot. He had to get on her good side now. "Just checkin' up on you, y'know? Wanted to make sure you were okay, sleeping alright, that sort of thing." His rambling drew to a halt and he realized his error. "Actually I don't really care, I just wanted to talk to ya." Damn the truth, damn it to hell, now she was gunna ask…

"Oh really? What did you want to talk about?"

SHIT. Shit shit shit, mother fucking…. "I wanted to convince you to take back that whole lying rule." God damnit. He hadn't wanted to bring that up yet.

"Oh, well, you can just stay out of my room then, and leave well enough alone. I don't have any reason to change my mind about that. I think the punishment is already doing you a world of good." She smiled and walked away, leaving him to fume.

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Pooooor Betelgeuse. snirkgiggle Once again, any tips would be -dandy-.


	3. Chapter 3

Aright, this chapter is a little shorter than the last two, but it was pretty fun to write. Hope you all enjoy!

Thank you so much, to all the people who have already given me reviews, you guys rock my world! I plan to reply individually through the message system thing, and hey, if anyone wants to drop a line feel free to, I loves me some company.

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Lydia twirled in front of her mirror, examining the dress with a critical eye. She had been forced to go shopping with Delia, which was always a painful experience. The outfit suited her fairly well, however, after they had spent hours searching. It was scarlet red with black trim. The dress was form fitting and scrunched around the waist in a way that flattered almost any figure, the sleeves draped well past her shoulders and the skirt was mercifully free of tulle; draping with a graceful a-line shape over her hips all the way to the floor. She smiled tightly into the reflection. She had begged Delia to let her wear an all black dress to the fancy dinner she was being dragged to, but her stepmother would have none of it. They had settled on red, but Lydia insisted that at least the jewelry be black.

She folded her arms across her chest and frowned into the mirror. Everyone had said the dress looked good on her, but she generally mistrusted her stepmother's opinions and her father was always a little distant. Adam and Barbara were supportive enough, in their own way. She always got the feeling she could wear a paper bag and the couple would tell her she was beautiful, however.

She smiled a little, a sudden idea flashed into her mind. Oh, that was perfect… she knew exactly where to get an opinion she could trust.

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Betelgeuse lounged casually in the little coffin he had created for himself in the miniature graveyard. Things had gotten pretty boring since Lydia had brushed him off. He had tried a few cons, having convinced himself he didn't need her help anyway, but they had all failed utterly. All he could do was wait, at this point, maybe pester her a bit. As much as he hated to admit it, he needed the girl's help if there was any way he was going get his old un-life back.

"B….?"

Aaaah, there she was. He waited, a shit eating grin plastered across his face.

"Beej? BJ? C'mon, I wanna talk."

Wait for it… He knew it was coming.

"Betelgeuse!"

He popped himself above the miniature grave, leaning against the ragged little tree and looking up at the delicate face that scowled down to him.

"There you are. I have a question for you." She looked a little peevish… or was it nervous?

"Sure, okay. What do you want? Maybe make another deal? I dunno, can I trust you? You backed out on the last one you know."

She frowned a little and shook her head, "No it has nothing to do with that. I wanted…" She paused, suddenly her carefully crafted plan seemed pretty silly. Why should she care what he thinks about the stupid dress? Oh hell, why not ask anyway. If anything she could revel in the expression he'd make when asked one of the most dreaded questions any man (ghost?) could ever hear. "Does this dress make my butt look big?"

Betelgeuse gaped at her, surprise and horror spread across his grungy features before he frowned. "What the hell kind of question is that?"

"C'mon, I want to know. I can't trust anyone else to tell me the truth."

Well, that was certainly new. People came to him for a lot of things, but the truth was certainly not something he could ever sell before.

"Maybe a little."

It took her a second to realize he had answered her question. He had even answered it honestly the first time, and it sure as hell wasn't what she wanted to hear.

"I can't believe you! Huh!" She stormed away in a huff.

Betelgeuse watched her go. The dress may have made her butt look big, but it wasn't like that was a bad thing. He shook his head in wonder at women in general. "Jesus Christ, there is no winning, is there?"

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I think I'm having too much fun with this. cackles


	4. Chapter 4

Yay, another update, and so soon! I keep worrying I am running out of interesting things to write, and suddenly another piece falls into place.

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Lydia sighed to herself as she was carted around the elegant party that one of the richer neighbors had put on. Delia made a point of showing off her stepdaughter to anyone she might vaguely recognize. Lydia smiled and nodded and pretended to actually be interested in the names she immediately forgot. Parties were not her thing in the first place, let alone smarmy fancy-pants parties designed specifically to show off how well to do you happened to be.

There were not all that many people her age. She figured they must not rate high enough on the pompous list to warrant an invitation. Not that she minded all that much; she rarely got along with people her age anyway. Just a month or two, she assured herself, then you can go off to college and never have to deal with stupid high school boys ever again. She looked forward to college as both an escape from her house and also an excuse to meet a bigger variety of people than her little town had to offer.

She had noticed one guy her age slinking around the outskirts of the party, but he seemed more inclined to stare at her backside than anything else. It just managed to infuriate her; stupid dress and its stupid big butt illusions. It wasn't that big, was it? Betelgeuse had said so, though, and he wasn't even capable of lying about it. Well, he can think its big all he wants, stupid poltergeist. She huffed past the startled young man and didn't bother to dodge bumping into his shoulder rudely; served him right for staring at her like that, anyway. Soon enough she was promptly swept away by Delia to meet a few more depressingly boring people.

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Betelgeuse lounged around the cemetery. God was this boring. He couldn't even go pick up women, they all asked such stupid questions and then got pissed at the answers. "But... Do you love me?" should never be followed with "God no, woman, I have met chihuahuas that grate on my nerves less than your shrill voice." He cringed briefly at the memory and rubbed his cheek where the slap had landed. She had been pretty attractive, too, if you ignored the bullet hole in the middle of her forehead.

He had since begun to refuse to answer people when they asked things. It was starting to weird some of the other ghouls out, though; especially the ones that knew him well. Since con's were out of the picture, he was having a hard time finding things to do. Mostly he contented himself to spying on the Deetzes, but that got boring pretty quickly, especially with the girl out of the house at college. If only he could convince her to talk to him again. He began to chew his lip, trying to think of a way to get her attention that didn't involve her getting so damned pissed.

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Halloween was coming in a few short days and Lydia still did not have a stinking costume to hand candy out in. She knew full well that she didn't need a costume for that, but when the little kids went trick-or-treating through the dorms the previous year she had felt like a disappointment wearing only her regular old black clothes.

She even made a special trip home in order to dig through her parent's attic. It had been so convenient when she lived at home, everything was at her fingertips. Not that she minded the drive all that much, but she certainly didn't enjoy the fanfare that came along with each visit. When she had been living with her father and stepmother it was perfectly acceptable for her to wander off on her own and not be bothered by anybody. Now every meal had to be a special occasion. Delia had even decked the place out in goofy Halloween decorations in preparation for Lydia's visit.

Charles and Delia had finally gone to bed after a painful night of board games. Lydia immediately went up to the attic to search for a costume. The Maitlands were in the basement, Adam had been pretty engrossed in one of his projects and Barbara was down there to help. Sometimes Lydia wondered what exactly they did together because they were alone so much. She promptly decided not to think about it, viewing the couple as a second set of parents and really not wanting to imagine any ghostly hanky-panky between the two of them.

She finally unearthed one of the bigger Halloween boxes and grinned in triumph. She didn't notice at first the dull glow coming from the cemetery in Adam's miniature town. She dug and dug through the box, finding mostly plastic trinkets and pins with little red lights that blinked. She could have sworn that she had a witch costume or something that would still fit. Finally the glow became so bright she could not help but notice it.

Lydia stood over the model and frowned. She couldn't actually find a source for the light, just an odd glow from the general vicinity of the cemetery.

"Beej? Is that you?"

No response. Well… that was odd. She raised her voice a little.  
"Betelgeuse! What are you doing?"

"Hey." Came the high pitched response. He sounded… sulky.

She hadn't spoken to him since the dress ordeal. She didn't figure it would do any good to encourage him. She knelt down to squint at him.

"Well, what are you doing, making things glow like this?"

The little figure only shrugged and leaned against the tree, staring at her and looking fairly grumpy about it.

"Oh, you aren't answering me now, huh? Are you still mad or something?"

He pushed against the tree and stepped closer to her looming face. "Yeah I'm mad! You pulled a dirty trick on me asking about that dress, you know I couldn't lie even if I wanted to."

Lydia frowned, she hadn't thought about the dress in quite a while. Now that she considered it a little more, it did seem like a silly thing to get upset over; especially since he was actually being honest with her. "Oh. I'm sorry about that, B."

He grinned up at her, his sullen demeanor disappearing instantly with a smarmy grin to take its place. "Hey, babes, no hard feelings. What do you say you let me out and we show this town a real Halloween, huh?"

She frowned a little and shook her head. "No way, I know better than that. Besides, I'm going to be at the dorms for Halloween this year; it's on a school night."

"Aaaaw, c'mon! It'll be a blast!"

Lydia squinted at the tiny figure and bit her bottom lip. "A blast… What in the hell were you planning on blowing up, Beej?! Ah, absolutely not." And with that she was gone. She grabbed the oversized box to sort through in her room, where he could only appear as a glowy orb if she happened to be taking pictures.

Betelgeuse stood dejectedly in the little cemetery and shouted to deaf ears, "OH COME ON, I can make figures of speech you know!"

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I promise I'll be nicer to Betelgeuse soon!... Heh.


	5. Chapter 5

Yay, another chapter! A big one, even, and quite eventful. Hope you enjoy it, I'm totally diggin' all the responses I'm getting. Thanks for the good vibes, folks!

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It was Christmas and Lydia had finally managed to convince Delia that she was not needed at another one of her irritatingly wealthy parties. Okay, so she was coughing, sneezing, and generally spreading germs to everything she touched, too. Delia knew better than to expose any of her uptight friends to illness, but the end result was still the same. Lydia had the house to herself! And the Maitlands, but really, they were good company.

They spent most of the evening chatting and Lydia caught them up on everything that was happening in her life, which mostly had to do with school work, frustrating friends and the fact that college boys were just as disappointingly juvenile as the high school ones. She presented them both with presents; pictures of new things in town for Adam and some expensive looking fabric for Barbara. The evening was starting to wind down, though, and the ghostly couple took their leave for the basement, urging Lydia to get some sleep.

Shuffling up to her room, Lydia put on her pajamas, which consisted of a pair of black satiny bottoms and a ratty old Invader Zim shirt she had swiped from an ex-boyfriend. She stretched out onto her bed and stared up at the canopy top, waiting for sleep.

Sleep didn't come, and after an hour or so of rolling around, trying to get comfortable, sneezing excessively and otherwise feeling miserable she got up for a glass of water and began wandering around the house aimlessly.

Well, she though to herself, this is certainly boring. She sipped the water as she meandered along and stopped at the foot of the attic stairs. Could he still be there? She didn't figure he'd just want to up and chat, but anything was better than staring at the wall, wasn't it?

She left her glass in the sink and climbed up the stairs to the little model. There it was, the little cemetery with its little ragged tree that he seemed pretty fond of. She leaned over the model and whispered.

"Hey Beej, you there?"

Silence. Drat him.

"Betelgeuse you know damn well I'm only going to say your name once tonight!"

The lights flickered and went out, plunging the entire attic into darkness. A cool hand pushed itself against her mouth while its partner curled around to grip her tightly at the waist. Soft lips brushed against her ear and she heard the familiar gravelly whisper, much lower now that its possessor was full sized. "Is that a promise?"

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Lydia's heart pounded in her ears as she struggled to free herself. Damn him. She had said his name three times, hadn't she? Over the course of a year and a half she had said it three times. How the hell was she supposed to know it would accumulate like that? Struggling proved to be worthless; it only gave him cause to chuckle.

"Babes, you can keep that up all night, if you want. I'd rather talk, though, and t'do that I need your promise that you won't send me back right away."

Lydia stopped trying to escape and fumed silently. Betelgeuse loosened his grip enough for her to breathe normally, which she thought was uncharacteristically generous of him, especially with how angry he must be at her.

"C'mon, gimmy some credit here, if I was gunna hurt you, you'd be hurting. I'm bein' nice and giving you a chance to talk like a normal person. If I really wanted I coulda just glued your mouth shut."

She nodded tightly and he released his grip, stepping back fairly quickly to avoid any potential vengeance she might bestow him for tricking her. She didn't try to hit him or anything; however, he was surprised to watch her back away with so much fear in her face.

"What? I said I ain't gunna hurt ya." He gave her his best hurt puppy dog face, and was rewarded with a tentative smile.

"You didn't correct yourself."

"Didn't correct myself the first time either, what, do I gotta say it again or somethin'?"

"No… That's okay. I'm sorry. I'm just… why aren't you mad at me?"

"Of course I'm mad at you; you've made my afterlife the closest thing to a living hell you can get without actually bein' alive. Just cuz I'm mad doesn't mean I can't be civil." He cracked his neck and straightened the collar of his favorite black and white striped suit. He wouldn't admit to anyone that he'd dressed up the last couple of times Lydia had visited her parents, even if he couldn't lie his way around it.

Lydia had the sense enough to look a little guilty. "I'm sorry but… It was the only thing I could come up with, and it's not like you didn't try to trick me first!"

Betelgeuse frowned and took a few careful steps forward; he wasn't that much taller than the dark girl sniffling before him, but what he lacked in height he made up for in style. "It wasn't a trick, it was a proposition. A deal."

Lydia frowned and sneezed, cursing her cold for making her look weak she attempted to glare him down anyway. "You told me Adam and Barbara had gone, said they were deader than dead."

He rolled his eyes in frustration, damn her for remembering that. "Yeah, okay, I'm sorry about that, but really, that was the only lie! And it had nothing to do with our deal, which you were the one to bail on me." He punctuated the final word by jabbing his thumb towards his chest.

Lydia bit her lip and thought for a second. "I'm not going to marry you." Her voice was quieter than he expected, and at least it wasn't filled with hate.

"You owe me something."

"What do you want?"

He nearly exploded, "OUT, I want out, I've always wanted out, and I want this damned curse off of me so I can go back to my afterlife. Do you know how boring it has been? How tedious? Nobody wants to hear the truth, not a single person. Not you with your damned dress, not any of the other girls, even my poker buddies got sick of me. I bet Juno wouldn't even want the damned truth, even though she was the most thrilled to dole it out." He stopped when he realized he was pacing and that Lydia had taken a few steps back and was eying him warily. The living were so damned timid.

"Look, you're the only person that can fix this. I just want you to fix it." To his surprise and horror, her lip was trembling and she was sniffling even more than before.

"So… that's the only reason you didn't hurt me, then? You wanted me to fix it."

He was about to rip his hair out. It was everything he could do to keep his head from spinning. "Look, I ain't gunna hurt you whether you fix it or not."

"Why not? You said yourself you're mad at me."

"Because…" Ah shit, he did not like where this was going at all. "Just, because, okay? I don't want you hurt. Even if you are infuriating and ask stupid questions about dresses and don't even believe me when I'm physically incapable of lying."

Lydia smiled a little and wavered, tendrils of black crept into her vision from all sides before she could even formulate a response.

Betelgeuse managed to catch her before she hit the floor.

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Please don't kill me for the cliffhanger!


	6. Chapter 6

Alright folks. This chapter is very short and I'll tell you why at the bottom. I really appreciate all the support so far.

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Betelgeuse paced Lydia's room grumpily, waiting for the girl to wake up. He had waited for how long to get into Juno's office, and then filed papers for even longer, and then waited some more to just get a chance to talk to her, and now what was he doing? Waiting, that's what.

He grinned a little to himself, on the bright side; he was out and waiting now. It was an entirely different story all around. He poked Lydia in the shoulder and she rolled away from him. Kneeling beside the bed Betelgeuse furrowed his brow, watching the girl's chest raise and lower. To make sure she was breathing, of course.

Fairly confident that Lydia was, indeed, doing all of those things that people need to do to stay alive he turned his attention elsewhere. Screw waiting. He started digging through a chest of drawers, ferreting around to find anything of interest. Mostly the drawers were full of functional things, pencils and paper, socks, one had a few boring trinkets in it that he ignored. He tried the bottom drawer and was rewarded with bras and panties. Filching some of the nicer garments, he made sure to replace them with a few things from his own pockets. A ratty old pair of boxers that even he didn't know the origin of and a cockroach the size of his palm set carefully into the drawer and he closed it gently, sneaking a glance at Lydia to make sure she wasn't watching. She was still facing the other direction, so he proceeded to wander.

After the treasure of the underwear drawer, the rest of her room provided little interest. He wandered into the hallway and strolled along amiably. Here and there he would stop to turn something in the wrong direction, bump a picture crooked, drag his nail across the wallpaper to leave a giant scratch mark. He visited most of the rooms before he heard it, a faint whisper on the currents.

"Betelgeuse?"

Lydia sat up in a panic. Where was he? Shit! "Betelgeuse!" Before she could say it a third time he was at her side, cool hand pressed against her mouth once again.

"One more time… You promise not to say it?" She nodded; her brown eyes looked like they would pop out her head. He took his hand away gingerly and stepped back.

"Where the hell were you?" She looked around her room suspiciously and he was glad that he had left her room relatively undisturbed.

"Just lookin' around, stretchin' my legs, you know? I haven't been out in a long time, babes." He gave her his best winning smile, which by her expression came off as suspicious and creepy. He had told the truth, though; just not all of it.

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This is where my mind stalled. I'm not sure what happens after this, and I desperately want to keep Betelgeuse and Lydia in character... But I also want a happy ending. I'm sure you've all noticed the "Humor/Romance" categorization? Yeah, that's what I want. I'm afraid the story will go on hiatus until I can figure out what the hell I'm doing. Please, any help you can give will be very appreciated.


	7. Chapter 7

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Still eyeing Betelguese suspiciously, Lydia crawled out of her bed and headed for the door. Realizing he had not left the hallway looking quite presentable, Betelgeuse glided over to her and grabbed her by the shoulders, attempting to lead her to a chair.

"C'mon now, lets chat, right? It's been a long time, you've clearly changed, I wanna hear aaaaaall about your life. Got any boyfriends? You realize once you've gone ghost, there's no going back."

Lydia shook her head and pulled away from him. "Ugh. In a minute, I need to go to the bathroom." She opened the door to the hallway and sucked in a quick gasp of surprise at the transformation her parent's house had made in the short while she had passed out. Where once everything was meticulously placed and carefully cleaned regularly was now something that could be described as no less than chaos. Spinning to face him she glared for a few seconds as he cringed.

"Its just habit! I can fix it!" He grabbed her shoulder.

"Betelguese!"

He swore fluently and clenched his eyes shut as the world spun briefly and he was dragged back into his prison. Shit. How the hell was he supposed to get out this time? She sure as hell wouldn't fall for the same tricks twice. Once he finally stopped swearing he opened his eyes.

To his great surprise, Lydia still stood before him, though her expression had changed to something nearly unreadable.

"What the hell is going on? Where am I? Why didn't you go back?"

Looking at her with an expression of surprise that nearly paralleled her own, he shrugged. "Damned if I know what's going on. I did go back, and you came with me."

"What?" She looked a little lost and started to examine the room they stood in. It was unnervingly familiar. "Why would I come back with you? Am I really in…? Oh my god."

Betelgeuse shrugged, trying to think of every bizarre loophole he knew of that would create the anomaly of a living girl in the land of the dead. It wasn't going so well, all the loopholes he bothered to memorize usually dealt with things going the other direction. He leaned close to her and breathed in deeply, causing her to recoil with a look of disgust finally banishing the unreadable bewilderment. "Mmm, you still smell alive, that's for sure. Dunno why you're here… Unless…"

"Unless what!?"

"You still have the ring."

What little color that had graced Lydia's delicate features abandoned her instantly. She began to wring her hands and refused to look directly at the disgusting poltergeist.

"What would that matter?" She all but squeaked.

"It would mean we're still engaged, babes."

"That's ridiculous, why would I keep your ring?"

"I dunno. Why would you keep it?" He circled around her with a serpentine grace; she was so busy avoiding looking at him that she jumped nearly a mile when she felt his cool fingers against her neck.

Betelguese grinned impishly as he found what he was looking for. He pulled the delicate silver chain out of her shirt and settled himself in front of her, examining his ring as he let it dangle between their faces.

He repeated himself, his gravelly voice sounding as if it had been slicked over with oil. "Why would you keep it, Lyds?"

Lydia refused to look up, color was beginning to return to her face in the most embarrassing way possible.

--


	8. Chapter 8

--

--

With a shrug and a vicious grin Betelgeuse dropped the ring and broke the tension. Things were finally starting to go his way a little.

"Well, look on the bright side, babes. You wanted in, right?"

Lydia continued to avoid eye contact and began to look around the room instead. It took a minute or two for her to realize what she was looking at.

"Oh my god… This is my room." It was as if her room had been deserted for fifty years, and then lived in by ten slovenly college students for another ten. Filth covered the floor, walls, and furniture. "This is disgusting, what happened to it?"

"It's the underworld, babes. The things here are dead… even the inanimate ones."

Lydia was still examining the room with awe. Opening drawers and pulling out treasured objects that would have suffered less damage had they been dropped through a trash compactor.

"Is this how the Maitlands see our house?"

"Nah, different plans, you know? They get to stay in the real world, barely any powers invisible by most, confined to the house. I stay in the underworld, powers galore, but no way into the real world." He paused, and smirked a bit. "Well, almost no way. What are you going to do about your debt to me, babes?"

Lydia pursed her lips and shot him a dirty look. "No wedding, think of something else."

Irked, Betelgeuse bristled at her, "Now lookit here, little girl. A deals a deal, I didn't change my end any, did I? I saved your little ghostly buddies and you didn't give me nuthin'. In fact, you gave me worse than nuthin'." He paused at that and considered. While a wedding would get him out of the netherworld for good, at the very least he could get the damned curse taken off him and go after some other gullible little sap of a girl.

Lydia watched as Betelgeuse's features shifted from indignant rage to something disturbingly accommodating. "I'll think about it. Huh, why don't we look around, you know? I can show you around, introduce you to a couple-a buddies of mine."

--

Another blush threatened to creep over Lydia's face and she forced it away. "I feel a lot better here." She frowned a little in a puzzled sort of way. "Actually, it's kind of weird. I don't feel sick at all."

Lounging against the battered shadow of her desk, Betelgeuse shrugged nonchalantly, "Dead don't get sick, I guess."

Lydia chuckled a little, "No, I suppose they wouldn't. Shall we, then?" She started for the door of her room, wondering vaguely if the havoc he'd wreaked in the hallway would still exist under the overall decrepit nature of the netherworld.

Betelgeuse swept past her, floating through the doorway with ease. "Now hold your horses, babes. You can't go out there lookin' so lively."

"What would you have me look like?." She said, tilting her pretty little head to the side. Damn, she was pretty cute, wasn't she?

Betelgeuse grinned impishly and snapped his fingers. He guided her to the mirror and waited for the shrieks of horror.

"Oh my god…" Lydia drawled the words slowly and carefully. Betelgeuse wriggled in excitement for the impending explosion of fear. "This is SO COOL." Wait, what? "This is.. I mean, wow. This is perfect. You have to do this for me next Halloween, I mean seriously."

She stood before the mirror in awe, her appearance had changed drastically. Normally she was pale and somewhat delicate looking, but now she looked practically brittle. Her skin was bone white with dark sunken eyes to match Betelgeuse's, her hair hung black and limp and she wore a tattered black dress.

"As much as I like the shredded dress bit, mayhap you should leave a bit more fabric behind."

Grumbling, Betelgeuse snapped the request into existence, "God you're a demanding little..." He stopped himself. Anywhere he took that sentence promised more trouble than he was willing to stir in the girl he needed something from.

"Little what, BJ?"

"Girl?"

"I'm pretty sure that's not what you were gunna say."

"You're probably right."

Lydia gave up, she was getting too excited to see the rest of the dead world.

"Huh, fine then."

Betelgeuse extended his elbow and she wrapped her arm around his. A thrill of excitement coursed through her entire body. She was really going to see the netherworld.

--


	9. Chapter 9

--

--

Betelgeuse led Lydia out of the house and the walked down the long driveway to the road. The rest of the world had the same haggard appearance as Lydia's room. The sky was dark and gloomy with angry looking clouds rumbling their displeasure above them.

"Beej, why is it so ugly here? I mean, you can pop things into existence, can't you pop the netherworld… er. Better. That way you wouldn't -have- to come to the living world, right?"

"You know what kinda power that would take, babe?"

"It's not like you have a problem changing things."

Betelgeuse snorted a laugh and swung around to face the dark girl. "I'm the ghost with the most, you think I just made that shit up? Nobody else has power like me, little girl, I pulled every string and found every loophole there is to get where I am today and I can't do that sort of thing." He leaned in closer and Lydia forced herself not to back away. "The only thing keeping me from that kind of power is you."

Lydia held herself up a little higher. She was a little surprised to find she wasn't much shorter than the intimidating poltergeist. "Why should I give you that kind of power, anyway? All you'd do is squander it harassing the living."

He quirked a brow, his expression suddenly dead serious and more than a little thoughtful as he drawled, "You're talkin' about an entire upheaval of the system, babes."

Her mouth twitched in what might have been a devilish smile. In any event, it gave him a bit of a start to hear her response. "Isn't that what you do best?"

It was like a damned challenge. This little slip of a girl was -challenging- him. Damnit. He forced himself to smile, creating a final product that was less than friendly. "Need the powers first, Lydia dear."

--

Betelgeuse was surprised to find that Lydia took quite well to flying. He soared over the tiny little town at a fairly leisurely pace, enjoying the dark girl's occasional outburst of appreciation for the view.

"Aright, hold on tight."

"What?"

Without answering Betelgeuse wrapped both arms around her protectively and sped to the breaking point.

"What the hell are you-!?"

With the sound of shattering glass Betelgeuse slowed to a halt in midair. It took a little coaxing to get Lydia to unbury her face from his shoulder, but it wasn't like he was trying all that hard.

When she finally looked up she gasped in awe at the sight before her. He had taken her to his favorite haunt. The dead tended to congregate where the living were not, so this particular farm house was even more decrepit than the rest of the netherworld.

Betelgeuse lead Lydia inside and they were both forced to duck almost immediately as someone's hand flew overhead.

"SHIT, sorry! Oh crap, did you see where that landed?"

Lydia bent down to pick up the severed limb and hand it over to the frantic woman before her. She was nearly a head taller than Lydia with waist length chocolate blonde hair, watery eyes and an unfortunately large gaping chest wound that here fairly skimpy top showed off.

"Thank you! Hey, I haven't seen you around here before. My name's Milly." She looked down at her hands and realized that one was full of the other, making it hard to shake. "Oh, sorry, heh. Now I have to go and get it mended, ugh. Well, you know how it is."

Lydia smiled, "My name's Lydia. You know, I bet Beej could fix that pretty quick."

Milly looked puzzled, "Who?"

Lydia looked around for Betelgeuse, who was easy enough to find because he was whistling and trying to look inconspicuous. "Him. Beej, you should fix Milly's hand."

Betelgeuse sent Lydia a look that would have curdled milk, if there was any such thing as fresh milk in the underworld while a look of miffed realization spread across Milly's features. "Are you kidding? Lydia, was it? You must not know "Beej" here very well. He doesn't do a damn thing for anyone but himself."

Lydia snorted a laugh and eyed Betelgeuse, her amusement melting away in the heat of his glower. "Well, you gunna fix her up or what?"

He responded by floating through the front door of the establishment, leaving her to stare at his departure. "Um… Oh, I'm sorry Millie, I thought…"

Millie shrugged and stashed her hand away in a pocket. She extended her now free and connected hand to the girl without rancor. "Don't worry about it, hey? But don't fool yourself, he's bad news."

Lydia shook her hand and tried not to start at its lack of heat. "I guess. How will you get your hand fixed, now?"

Millie shrugged. "Dunno, might find a seamstress or somethin'. Damn things gunna be a problem no matter what until I get outa this place."

Feeling decidedly uncomfortable with her living existence in the world of the dead, Lydia said "Oh, well, good luck with that, I've um… gotta get going." and slipped into the house before Millie could respond, trying desperately to find the only person powerful enough to get her back home.

--


	10. Chapter 10

--

--

She finally caught up with him near the door to the kitchen. Every two or three steps were interrupted with a ghost or a ghoul greeting Betelgeuse with enthusiasm of one sort or another. Lydia nearly choked on a fit of giggles when a tiny attractive woman nearly ripped his head off. She kept quiet and watched his reactions to people. It seemed as if each person was greeted with a different voice, different posture, almost as if he were a different person to each of them. None of them seemed to notice the many faces of Betelgeuse, however, and he even managed to calm down the tiny woman screeching something about chihuahuas.

Eventually he settled down at a small table shoved in what must have been the dining room. Perfectly solid ghosts milled around, bumping and jostling from every angle as Lydia struggled to seat herself. They sat together for a short time, Lydia shoving Betelgeuse off of her whenever he got too cuddly and Betelgeuse torn between trying to schmooze the girl and finding someone more willing to entertain him.

Lydia couldn't quite figure out whether or not she was having a good time. A part of her felt more at home in the dingy netherworld than she ever had at her parents house, or even college, but another part of her was starting to revolt against all of the horrible death wounds she kept seeing on the chatty crowd. At first it had been fascinating, but all of the real life gore was starting to make her feel a little sick. She was a little irritated with herself for the weakness. Wasn't she the spooky one? Wasn't this her cup of tea? No matter how much she argued with herself, however, her body continued to remind her that while they might not be living, she still was.

"Beej, how come everybody here has some awful wound of one sort or another?" She lowered her voice as a figure walked by whose head was only just barely connected to the rest of him.

Betelgeuse used the excuse of talking to her to lean in close to Lydia and snake his arm around her tiny waist. "Just the way it works, Lyds. The people that want to stick around are usually the ones with the ugliest stories to tell."

"You had the choice to go somewhere else?"

Betelgeuse shrugged and considered. "Me? Somewhere else? Maybe. Sort of. Kind of, not really. I guess, it depends on how you look at things. Each level is sort of a mystery to the next, you know? Living don't know about the dead, the dead don't know much about what happens once you move on from here."

"Oh. There's more to it than just this?"

"Yup. I mean, there's the room where ghosts go when they've been exorcized, but they don't stay in there forever. Eventually we head into the next level. Who knows, maybe there's a level after that, too?"

Lydia shook her head. "That's just weird, why do it that way? I mean, what purpose does it serve?"

Betelgeuse just shrugged, losing interest in the conversation already. "Dunno, babes. Don't really care to find out."

--


	11. Chapter 11

Holy shit guys, its an update

Holy shit guys, its an update? Yup.

**Make SURE you re-read at least chapters 7-10. I rewrote them… mostly the same things happen for vastly different reasons.**

I'm hoping Lyds and Beej are more in character now.

--

Lydia stood up, unable to stand staring at the rotting crowd. It was a little unnerving to realize that people were pretty much exactly the same after they died. This particular batch had a few more interesting stories (mostly about the horrible ways they had died), but overall the guys were the same jerky assholes she'd been dealing with throughout all of high school as well as part of college and the women were the same shrill self indulgent bitches.

"I'm… uh, I'm gunna walk around a bit."

Betelgeuse, she realized belatedly, was chatting up a cute little redhead, who from all appearances looked like she'd just died yesterday. Her face was still a bit rosy and she was looking fairly awkward. The awkwardness was probably mostly due to dodging Betelgeuse's groping hands and still trying to maintain some semblance of a conversation.

Lydia scowled and stormed off into the bowels of the house. She eventually found a staircase and made her way up it, trying to figure out her feelings for the netherworld she had dreamed so much about. Adam and Barbara couldn't even come here if they wanted, and her sweet ghostly parents would have never wanted to in a million years.

She smiled at the site of a doorway that led to a room which, miraculously, didn't appear to have any one in it. She made her way to the dingy tattered bed and sat down, inspecting her surroundings. Even for the netherworld the room looked a bit on the messy side. She nearly jumped out of her skin when she saw the very faint outline of a small, very old man sitting at a desk.

She walked over to inspect what he was doing, which turned out to be writing a letter. It was nearly impossible to read his scratchy handwriting, but it appeared to be made out to his daughter, who he was trying to convince his house was haunted.

Betelgeuse floated into the room, irritated by Lydia's disappearance in the kitchen. He snuck up behind her and curled his arms around her waist, burying his nose in her dark hair. "Hey, babes, running from me?"

Stifling a small shriek, Lydia tried to wriggle out of his grip. "Beej!" The irritating poltergeist cackled and responded by sinking his hands a little lower. Lydia didn't even bother to stifle her scream this time and Betelgeuse floated away, casually laughing.

Tossing him a halfhearted glare, Lydia returned her attention to the old man. "Who is he?" The man hadn't even flinched at her screams, it was clear he couldn't see her.

"Old guy owns the place. Crazy as shit, I tell you. Thinks his house is haunted." Betelgeuse grinned impishly at the irony as Lydia sent him cool stare. "Don't worry 'bout him, he'll kick the bucket any day now and finally get to join the party."

"That's so sad… He's all alone here." An obnoxiously loud crash came from the basement of the house and the old man finally reacted. He jerked standing and stared at the door of the room. After muttering softly to himself he sat back down and continued to write, faster this time, with a sour expression on his face. "I don't really think he's going to want to join the party… He looks really unhappy."

Betelgeuse shrugged. "Who cares? Look, you wanted to see the netherworld and now all you're doing is obsessing over the -living guy-. I'll tell you what, at least he's got his life still. More'n most of us can ask for."

Lydia's mouth twisted in what might have been a morbid smile. "Not more than you could ask for." 

With a shrug and a toothy grin Betelguese grabbed her hand and pulled her into him. She swatted at his chest, causing clouds of dust to billow off. "I can ask for a lot, babes. Now say my name."

With a snort, Lydia complied. She had already decided she didn't care for the netherworld, no matter how much she liked spookiness. There wasn't anything all that spooky about how the people acted, in fact, if you glossed over there horrific wounds it had been as entertaining as the frat party she'd been dragged to her freshman year.

**--**

Eh, I feel rusty. Bah.


End file.
